Sometimes days are just like that...and random thoughts in October.

Our school has been without a working voice mail system for a while. When I say for a while, I mean since last spring. This has been an issue because the voice mails somehow get out there in "voice mail land". They must take a trip to Disney World, perhaps spend the day at the beach, and somehow end up in voice mail boxes a couple of days later. This has made any kind of credibility that we have in being responsive quite difficult....but everyone has been understanding for the most part when we try to explain messages are taking some kind of TransSiberian Train ride before they come to our phones.

We finally got new phones on Monday. This was very exciting, because new stuff is just...well, new, and a bit different, and new phones have absolutely nothing to do with data or test score improvement. This is a nice diversion sometimes.   The phones are quite hip and trendy, and come with all kinds of digital buttons and screens and features that most of us have no idea what to do with at the moment.  And we can't use the intercom system, because they have to some how magically sync the phones with the intercom system. However, the new phones do have a paging system that will let you page and make announcements over the phone. All this feature has done so far is scare our staff members half to death. One of our fifth grade teachers typically keeps his phone in his room closet (no comment here about that :) and he said that it was a little disturbing the other afternoon to hear my voice coming out of his closet.  It doesn't take much to entertain us at Colinas.

Along with the phones, we had a deadline today in which the teachers would turn in their Professional Development Plans (or PDPs ) to us. Since today was the last day, I spent most of my time in meetings going over these plans with individual teachers. And it rained. All day. In New Mexico, we need the rain...but having rain leads to inclement weather day..which leads to fear and dread among teachers and staff. Let's just say that children do best when they are outdoors during recess, running amok. ( I love the word amok. Don't ask me why. It is a word that is applicable to many things and situations).


As in:


1. Tila is running amok. This is a normal occurrence.
2. My brain is running amok. Also a normal occurrence.
3. My shoes are running amok. Why is it that you are always looking for a pair of shoes...and one is always missing? Do they hate you?  Do they get together in the middle of the night in your closet and decide to hide to drive you crazy in the morning at 5:00 am? (The fact that most likely Tila has run off with one of them doesn't factor into this. In fact, Tila found one buried in the cushions of a wing chair in my bedroom after a YEAR..yes, a year does not factor into this). This of course, was after I had given up all hope and purchased another pair that were similar to them.

The rain also happened during the Albuquerque Balloon Fiesta. This is one of the biggest and best events if you live in Albuquerque, and it ALWAYS leads to wind and rain. ALWAYS. It hadn't rained in months, but it chose to rain 2 or 3 days straight because you guessed it...the Balloon Fiesta was in town. Makes you wonder if God has a bit of a sense of humor. Well, of course God has a sense of humor. He gave someone the idea for the Chia Pet.

Have a Sunday where your world isn't going amok. ;-)

.

Are you a Good Witch? Or A Bad Witch?

I always loved watching the Wizard of Oz growing up. This was of course back when it only came on once a year..and it was a BIG deal. It was usually on Sunday nights..and my sisters and I would sit on the floor, filled with anticipation and dread. I loved the first part of the movie..Ms. Glitch on her bike (da da da da da da daaa.) the tornado spinning the house in Oz, the Munchkins, the Scarecrow, The Lion, and the Tin man.


And then there was the Wicked Witch of the West. (shudder)


I did not like the latter part..especially the flying monkeys and The Wicked Witches' henchmen.  I really got upset when the flying monkeys tore the scarecrow apart..and when the henchmen said that chant. (ooo eee oooo eeee ooooo aaa). But the Wicked Witch did melt at the end, Dorothy figured out that she already had everything she needed where she was, and the Tin Man did get his heart..although he had it anywho.


This sounds suspiciously like my life, I might add.


Just like the movie, I was looking forward to this school year with anticipation and dread. Anticipation because I love the group of people that I work with...dread because things were changing and moving faster than the tornado did that lifted Dorothy's house off to Oz.


It looks like we're not in Kansas anymore, either.


I knew this year would be harder on everyone. We had staffing cuts, due to budget and to our school population. For the first time since I've become the principal, we were forced to combine grade levels..so that our class sizes wouldn't reach 35 or 40. We have Special Education teachers working with different grade levels, and even some General Education teachers doing the same.  Our district has always been a huge proponent of lower class sizes and staffing so that our children get the maximum support. With the budget shrinking faster than the Tin Man's heart, this was not possible this year. And things had to change.


And no one likes the changes much, I might add.


Since I've been in administration, I have noticed ebbs and flows in a school year. It always seems like there is a HUGE dip in November. ...and then again in the spring, especially when there is a long stretch between breaks. This year, we have hit the dip in September...which is scary. Everyone is working hard, stretched to their limit, and exhausted. On top of less staff and support, we are expected to do target more specific needs, and perhaps do a backflip to show that we can juggle data, support families that are also struggling to stay afloat, and have some semblance of a personal life.


I have always been a person who likes it when people are happy and content. (Amazingly enough, there are actually people that don't like it when people are happy..but that's another story).  The staff that work at Colinas work harder than anyone I know..and they have a level of excellence that they expect to stay at each year..but this year is different entirely.


And I didn't know what to do.


I LIKE to know what to do..it's the teacher in me, it's the people pleaser in me..it's me. I like it when people are happy and content. In short, I  have visions of being a shorter, darker haired version of the Glinda, the Good Witch.

Silly me.


This year, I have had to be more direct than I have ever had to be. Ever. Because of the expectations that are coming from the state; and also because we want to make sure that every child has the support that they need..and that we give the support that is needed for both the students and the staff to do so.  Part of this I agree with...we do need to look at data and best practices to ensure we are doing the right things for our kids..and back our ideas with solid data and best practices. Part of this I don't agree with..constraints and guidelines that don't make logical sense, and most importantly, aren't fair to the students and the teachers.


All of the above made me feel at times as if I was now the very person I was terrified of each year...

This of course, will not do. At all. She definitely has bad hair care.


All of this left me exhausted and befuzzled and sad. I wasn't sure what I could do to make it better for everyone...since the circumstances weren't going to change..or to help everyone...because of course I like to be helpful. 


And then I started to think. This of course is in conjunction with the books that I've been reading about how to stay present in the "now"...how to be the person you want to be..even though everything around you is not what you want it to be. 


I have the power to change that. I do have the power to change one thing. I can't change the circumstances of this year, or what is going on in my life (like where in the world is Mr. Right...or Mr. Kinda almost Right) but I can change my attitude about how I feel.  Our very wise counselor at Colinas (who actually IS
our Glinda, the Good witch) told me a quote by Victor Frankl, which says, " Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. " 


I can choose my response to all this. I can choose to face the circumstances, but still respond in the way that  is positive and affirming. I can choose to come to school each day..and face my life each day with making the very best responses I can in the very best of difficult circumstances. And in doing so, perhaps there is a chance that I can still do the job I was hired to do...and support the people that I care about. 


I have the power.

I think I'm buying the wall hanging above for Christmas presents..or maybe putting it on T-shirts. :)